A wonderful session with The Right Steps Dance – they are so inspiring – teaching dance from young people, to visiting care homes.
We talked around how our minds work, how stress and anxiety can have an impact on us and our clients, how to prioritise tasks, and to not take on too much, by having the confidence to say that powerful little word – No – which can be hard to do sometimes
If your organisation would like a talk, please do let me know
A much longer post than normal, I’ve always been a writer and if this helps anyone, then that’s great ✨
We are human and we all at times, can feel like we’re fighting the enemy within, trying to escape, bury, tame or pacify our deepest dreaded demons or fears, sometimes to the point of irrationality, even insanity.
Ironically what you fear the most, you generally focus on, or spend all your energy trying to avoid, which actually brings it into your reality, thus re-enforcing the fear.
So powerful are your thoughts.
What I have learnt is: Make Peace with Yourself, don’t fight with your ‘enemy’ within, you will not defeat them, you won’t win.
Get to know them, you will find you want the same thing! to win at life, to survive and thrive, to have success and happiness.
Once you accept this as the truth, you become the closest of allies, working together towards your greater good, enabling you to reach your potential, to be creative and solution focused.
Face your demons and fears head on. Really look them in the eye. What have you to lose by doing so? Identify them for what they are, how they make you feel, and why? because, by facing them what’s the worst that could happen- really?
If you don’t – they will always haunt you, and steel your inner happiness, eat at your self worth, ravage your soul, leaving you empty, exhausted, despondent and unhappy, also anxious and possibly depressed, stagnating, not moving forward or growing, as well as maybe being physically chronically unwell.
As soon as you do face them and get in touch with the emotions they evoke in you, you will realise, that your demons and fears were on your side all along, trying their best to protect you and keep you safe.
Once faced, and identified for what they are, your ‘demons’ become your closest friends, and the fears literally vanish.
Once you do this; Your mind clears, the clarity is incredible and you can then live in your truth, be authentically you, live in each moment fully, having true enjoyment, feeling wonderfully happy on the inside, knowing that’s where your happiness resides for always- regardless of circumstance and any negative people around you. (Do try and remember though, that everyone is just doing the best they know how at the time)
Your physical health will improve miraculously.
Realising the importance and power of nurturing good thoughts, will mean you will always strive to think positively, to switch negativity off and forever focus on making everything as bright beautiful and as brilliant as can be. You will be in the driving seat of your life, making better choices., and being open to opportunities.
Not to say you won’t have times where you feel sad or not in control of situations and circumstances, you may feel frustrated and angry, but you will know to get in touch with how you feel, to let go, and choose different thoughts around the situation – choose to view things in a different way, and feel better, because you know you can.
Only you control how you are, how you feel, and that you just don’t ‘live there’ anymore, in a ‘bad’ negative or defensive place, you’ll choose a better place to be, it is amazing.
For me this also includes sometimes surrendering, and offering up to the universe, what’s going on, and having faith and belief that everything will work out in the best possible way, or that you will grow through having had a valuable lesson.
Change is the only constant in life, and you will learn to naturally go with the flow more, to choose Happy, this becoming your constant.
You will also choose to Love who you are, know yourself better, nurture your body, mind, soul and spirit. Believe in, validate and value yourself and your place in your world, and the world, the universe, as a whole – that everything in your experience – your life, begins and ends with You. Your thoughts, feelings, perception, actions, energy and happiness.
Believe me, it’s possible, you’re worth it, and it works.
Andrea Barker Confidence Coach
I am currently running a 10 week course on Confidence, and it is the most amazing experience to see the confidence of the attendees emerging. We have just had week 4 – and the participation, and sharing of experiences is so good, which enhances the learning for all. The environment created is a safe one, where the attendees are supported, and only required to share what they feel comfortable with, and as a group, we all agree to absolute confidentiality ‘Chatham house rules’ – ‘What’s said in the room, stays in the room’
A lot of what we are doing is quite thought provoking and about getting to know yourself better, so you can make better choices for yourself, and feel confident stepping out into new situations, to do what it is you enjoy, to stand up for and look after YOU.
So far we have covered;
week 1 – What is Confidence and Self-confidence? What is confidence to you?
week 2 – Understanding yourself, and how your mind works and what makes you You, getting to Know yourself
week 3 – How we learn and why we kind find change difficult, even if it’s good for us!
week 4 – Perception, Beliefs and stepping out of your comfort zone
week 5 will be – Communication. Saying No and saying Yes. Body language. Getting your message across and being heard
…and so much more over the 10 weeks
I present a subject, and we have discussion, there is active participation, worksheets and lovely things to try and ‘homework’ 🙂
I absolutely Love what I do. Seeing the small shifts, and big leaps people make, the smiles and laughs – is priceless
Why I love what I do – click on the link if you would like to watch the video
We all have times where it’s not another person’s behaviour that surprises us, it’s our own.
This can sometimes be in the positive, though quite often not.Facing up to yourself, even though it can be hard, is the best thing to do. You will never regret it.
To dwell is not to grow, so even if the lesson is a painful one, it is far better to learn from it, than get stuck in blame or regret and beating yourself up.
Try to separate the behaviour from the person.
The person we are, is not our behaviour in times of stress, anger, hurt, feeling uncertain, or unsafe, we are merely doing the best we know how at the time, to survive a situation, not always very well, and usually not with the intention to hurt or harm, but the outcome is rarely good.
Reflect on your actions and take responsibility.
Try to understand yourself better, and what triggered your behaviour, in a kind gently challenging way, as you would a best friend, so that you can be open to finding a way to let go, and learn how to ‘pause’ and choose how you would like to act, rather than to react, in the future.
Do say sorry if you need to, be sincere, and know it may or may not be accepted.
Forgive yourself and others – you’re only human after all, and it’s hard to get it right, all of the time.
If you would like help to feel better about yourself- to step into a better version of you, to understand unhelpful patterns of behaviour you may be experiencing…
Then do get in touch for a free chat
I help you from a place of genuine experience, and wanting you to feel so much better, and embrace who you are.
We all make mistakes- sometimes costly ones, but you can break the cycle and be a happier You
The attendees shared the value of what they had learnt on the MOTIVATE course.
From more efficient task management and completing a whole task, by concentrating on it, and feeling more accomplished at the end of a day, to setting up a writing club, to aid with accountability and also support with getting a book completed, and ticking things off that were on the vision board / wish list.
Amazing everyone – great to hear of the success and that your are moving forward with your goals.
My newsletter from February 2018 🙂
Please note, the contact number for your Confidence Coach has changed to:
07973 442 056
✨Create the world you want to be part of.Starting with You. ✨
You be the person you want to spend time with, love and laugh with.
Every thought you have created your outer world.
As within – so without.
Your world begins and ends with a You. You are the centre of your universe.
I see clients who want so much to be right in their lives, to ‘be happy’ to have the right partner, job, friends, life – once you really get to know You, your true self, and let go of anger resentment frustration and guilt, and concentrate on being the person you would love to be around – everything changes – I know